MANY, MANY (ok - 4) years ago, I wrote a post on raising The Boy to be a man. Today, I have an update.
This afternoon, I received a phone call toward the end of my day at work. I saw the name on the phone was the head of intermediate school at The Boy's school (and for convenience sake, we'll call her the principal).
Uh oh!
I answered my phone and was greeted with an immediate "He's OK and She's OK!" Have I mentioned that I love their school?! After that initial comment, the principal went on to tell me about an incident at school today. Apparently, it was something that had been brewing for some time and started coming to a head yesterday. Today, it did.
In a nutshell, a young lady has been pretty ugly to The Boy for a while. She frequently calls him names and hits him and such. I took it as her having a crush on him, so I mostly ignored it. He took it as 'she's annoying!' and mostly ignored it. Yesterday, though, it was a bit much, and he said something ugly and hurtful to her. He later said he thought it'd make her stop and go away. (It didn't.) Today, she physically attacked him. The Boy simply raised his arm to deflect the hits and scratches (and has a nifty scratch on his arm).
In my conversation with the principal, I could tell the incident was about 85% this girl and 15% The Boy, although she never actually said that. She also went on and on to say how proud she was of how The Boy handled the situation - both with this girl and also with her when she questioned him. When he came home from school, he immediately told me we needed to talk. Once again, I was struck by his maturity as The Boy told me the entire story as it had unfolded. I explained my disappointment in what he said to this girl and he agreed it was not smart. Still, I was proud of how he handled EVERYTHING else. He even told me about another small incident at school that was also VERY well handled.
The boy was assigned Saturday school for inappropriate language. He is OK with that. He understands and is not upset. His only concern is that he almost never has homework (he finishes in class or study hall) so he will have nothing to do during his time. Instead, he is going to speak to the principal tomorrow about working off his time instead.
After The Boy and I spoke, I called the principal back and thanked her again. I told her how happy I was with how The Boy had come to me and handled himself and she was thrilled. She was also impressed with his forethought in knowing he'd HAVE to have homework to do and she said she is very receptive to the idea of his working off his hours instead.
I think something is working. We are raising a MAN!
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